We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
