dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize