She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!