Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
