I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
