Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
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