accomplished twins. life is a go
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
