So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize