Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
