After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
