But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
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You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
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Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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