I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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