I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
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