I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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