Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
