In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha