Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
