you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Randomize