He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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