i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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