I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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