Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty? http://tfl.nu/lq5o
  Replies (42) Good night (1103) Bad night (2443) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator? http://tfl.nu/votk
  Replies (50) Good night (1520) Bad night (8555) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise. http://tfl.nu/ygq6
  Replies (14) Good night (4396) Bad night (506) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids. http://tfl.nu/b0ha
  Replies (7) Good night (3355) Bad night (564) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!? http://tfl.nu/nh7f
  Replies (39) Good night (8193) Bad night (745)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever http://tfl.nu/plkd
  Replies (1) Good night (4856) Bad night (745) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?

  (636): View more from Missouri

  our generation is not ready to get married

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"? (636): our generation is not ready to get married http://tfl.nu/klk9
  Replies (49) Good night (6722) Bad night (2359)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (856): she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name. http://tfl.nu/fuep
  Replies (34) Good night (4389) Bad night (1498) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you. http://tfl.nu/ejbb
  Replies (9) Good night (7693) Bad night (786)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (251): I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time. http://tfl.nu/fcdx
  Replies (13) Good night (4095) Bad night (801) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough. http://tfl.nu/vxm3
  Replies (10) Good night (1532) Bad night (595) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him? http://tfl.nu/47cq
  Replies (9) Good night (3069) Bad night (762) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god http://tfl.nu/kj7l
  Replies (2) Good night (1231) Bad night (1255) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories. http://tfl.nu/6x0g
  Replies (1) Good night (1992) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you. http://tfl.nu/4mkg
  Replies (7) Good night (1887) Bad night (601) Order T-Shirt

Randomize