just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
