Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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