Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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