maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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