I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
