I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
