Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
