Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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