No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Four minutes until I can fart!
It was confusing and full of hummus
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize