nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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