What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Randomize
