Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
