porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
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