As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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