I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
