she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
