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• (419): View more from Ohio

  idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night

  (248): View more from Michigan

  he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (636): View more from Missouri

  you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.

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• (509): View more from Washington

  Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.

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• (818): View more from California

  You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.

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• (763): View more from Minnesota

  I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.

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