he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
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My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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