Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
