I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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