i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
