He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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