Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
please come you make the beer taste better
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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