She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize