It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
