im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
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