just survived the first fart of the relationship.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
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