I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
