no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I just made out with a guy for $7.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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